Making a man cum is pretty easy. Making a woman cum is not. A woman’s sexual anatomy is more complicated than ours, so it’s important to first figure out how things work down there and use this knowledge to deliver an orgasm. A real one.
You see, according to statistics, women fake orgasms for many reasons. Recent studies have found women fake to get already dismal sex over with and to keep her man from straying. So first and foremost, let’s make sure she doesn’t have to fake it, alright?
We can do this by learning about her body. It’s this knowledge that will set us apart from the legions of men who insist they’re legends in the sack but have really just been fooled by a woman’s acting skills. Be the rarity who took the time to learn what she likes instead of getting your education from porn, which is merely entertainment and not at all an educational platform. Trust me, the porn stars I’ve interviewed agree: porn should never be viewed as education. Ever.
The knowledge offered below is what’s been found effective for most women. But of course, like men, all women prefer different things and it’s your job to get better acquainted with her body and communicate these likes and dislikes. In the meantime though, it’s safe to say she will be in good hands (your hands) by committing to the following techniques — all of which work perfectly fine on their own but have the ability to be even more effective when cleverly combined.
G-Spot stimulation (Foreplay)
If you want to build arousal prior to penetration, a good way to do so is by stimulating her G-Spot with your hand. Entering palm up, reach two inches inside the vagina until you find a ridge-like area on the upper wall. Here, you’ll perform a “come hither” motion with your fingers. Switch things up a bit, of course, but know that this motion is the best way to stimulate the G-Spot, so revisit it as often as you can.
If the G-Spot is tough to find, continue with this motion. The G-Spot expands as she becomes more aroused.
G-Spot Stimulation (Intercourse)
Most positions hit the G-Spot, but some hit it better than others. Without having to differentiate between the two, here are the positions best for G-Spot stimulation:
Doggystyle: This is by far the best position for G-Spot stimulation and it’s fairly well-known but in case you’re unfamiliar here’s how it’s done, just have your partner get on her hands and knees and enter her from behind then penetrate.
Legs Up: Start in standard missionary and lift your partner’s legs so that her ankles rest on your shoulders. By lifting her legs, you allow for deeper penetration and more contact with the G-Spot.
Woman On Top: Lean up against your headboard with some pillows behind your back so that your body’s at a 45-degree angle. Have your lady straddle you, with one leg on either side of your hips. If this angle doesn’t work, try sitting up or leaning back more. Find which angle works best for you two.
Hitting the clitoris during intercourse is much more difficult than it is to hit the G-Spot. As such, we’re choosing positions that best hit the clitoris but also allow either you or her to stimulate the clitoris while penetrating.
Coital Alignment Technique: Start in the missionary position with you between her legs and maneuver yourself so that your pelvis is slightly higher on her body that it is during missionary. In this position, she should grind instead of thrust. By changing the alignment of her pelvis, your pubic bone rubs up against her clitoris. This is something she’ll like very, very much.
Tight Doggy: Like I mentioned above, traditional doggy has the man’s legs in between hers, but in this variation, place your legs outside of hers and make sure hers are held together. This creates a tighter fit, therefore making it more likely to hit the clitoris. If not, reach around and stimulate it for her.
X Marks The Spot: With your partner on her back and your pelvises at the same height, lift her legs, cross them at the ankles and rest said ankles on your shoulders. Enter her and you will find that there is a much tighter fit and that you have much easier access to her clit.
Indirect Clitoral Stimulation
This is a technique I learned reviewing OMGYES.com, a wonderful paid website dedicated to educating audiences on the female orgasm. A technique I found particularly effective is called “layering.” This technique means to apply indirect pressure to the clitoris through its surrounding skin — something two of three women get more pleasure from, according to research conducted by the website.
An effective layering technique is hilariously called: The Clit Sandwich. To prepare said sandwich, use the skin alongside the clitoris to apply pressure to the sensitive clitoris (the skin on either side represent the bread, for visual purposes) and can be done through the panties if you’re so inclined. Easy enough, right? If not, there’s an even easier technique to apply and that’s sliding your fingers over the clitoral hood (not the clitoris itself) when it’s wet.
Some guys feel threatened by sex toys, and I get it. These things were created for sexual pleasure so there’s a slight chance they may outperform us. But they don’t, that’s just silly. Instead of viewing a toy as a nemesis, see it instead as an ally, a tag-team partner.
If you’re a tad reluctant of this prospect, perhaps this will help. Research from the infamous Kinsey Institute found that women who masturbate with vibrators experience higher levels of desire, arousal, lubrication, and orgasm. Kind of tough to disagree with, isn’t it? If it’s couple’s sex toys you’re after, may I recommend the LELO TIANI.
Haven’t had sex with lube? Give it a shot, trust me on this. Research out of Indiana University found that women who use lube report significantly more “sexual satisfaction” than those who forgo the slippery stuff.
The study surveyed 2,453 women, each of which was assigned one of six water- or silicone-based lubricants during either intercourse or a solo session. The study ultimately found both lubes were better than no lube. So there you go. I recommend Wicked Sensual Care.